BIRTHDAY SUIT -- THE MOVIE
Final Script
Note: This final script is the actual text of the words used in the movie. Slight changes made during filming and post-production editing are reflected faithfully in this version of the script.
INT. CLASSROOM - DAY
RHODRI DAVIES is standing in front of his first-year
university history class. He is dapperly dressed in a
lamb's wool suit, hand-tailored in Italy.
RHODRI
(VO)
Today is my birthday again and I am
forty-four years old. I wore my
birthday suit to class this morning, in
memory of last year, when I went
shopping with my mother. Shirt, socks,
tie, suit: I wear them all. The
kids, used to me in sweatshirt and
jeans, look shocked.
A REDHEAD sitting in the second row raises her hand.
REDHEAD
Are you going to a wedding Mr Davies?
RHODRI
No. I have no intention of getting
married.
A BOY at the back chimes in.
BOY
Someone die then?
RHODRI
No, not yet, but they might. I'm coming
round with some tests and the sooner
you get started, the sooner you'll know what
you forgot to study.
Groans of disapproval echo round the room.
Rhodri returns to his desk and listens to the sounds of
pencil and ballpoint pen pushed over paper.
The blonde girl in the front row, far right, stares
intently at Rhodri, making him blush and squirm in his
seat. He looks out the window.
EXT. STREET BY TAILOR SHOP - DAY
An elderly woman, MRS DAVIES, is being pushed in a
wheelchair by her son, Rhodri, up the street to the front
of the tailor shop.
RHODRI
(VO)
My mother still insists on shopping for
me. She says I am incapable
of choosing anything respectable for
myself. Last year, when I was home, she
borrowed one of my father's charge
cards.
MRS. DAVIES
We're almost there, Rhodri.
RHODRI
Yes, mother.
MRS. DAVIES
The tailor is just ahead.
RHODRI
But Mother, I don't like ...
MRS. DAVIES
It's your birthday, Rhodri. You're
having a new suit.
Mr. GARETH MORGAN, the tailor, sees them approaching
his shop and he greets them. He is an old man who
considers himself a man of the world, an international
citizen, always ready to help others.
GARETH MORGAN
Lovely weather for the time of year.
Mrs. Davies gets up out of her wheelchair, waits for
Rhodri to fold it and stack it against the side of the
doorway. She takes him firmly by the arm, and pulls him
the last few steps into the shop.
INT. TAILOR SHOP - DAY
The tailor shop is filled with ties and shirts and socks
and various types of jackets. It is modern yet charming.
Mr. Morgan leads Mrs. Davies and Rhodri to the suit
section of the store.
MRS. DAVIES
Mr. Morgan, my son is in need of a fine
suit as befits an ... university
professor.
Mr. Morgan turns his head slightly indicating that he is
impressed with the social status of his customer
GARETH MORGAN
An university professor? I knew he
was a teacher...but an university
professor...
Mrs. Davies nods her head, her eyes half-closed and full
of belligerent sagacity.
MRS. DAVIES
An ... university professor. And he
needs a new suit. A nice suit, Mr
Morgan. You know what I mean?
GARETH MORGAN
I know exactly what you mean. Now he'll
need a whole new outfit?
MRS. DAVIES
Oh yes, Mr. Morgan. A complete outfit
would be nice. A shirt and a tie and
a pair of socks and a matching silk
handkerchief for his little breast
pocket.
Mr. Morgan chuckles while patting his breast pocket.
He looks Rhodri up and down.
He searches through a rack for the right suit.
GARETH MORGAN
Now, this is what I call a nice suit.
MRS. DAVIES
Indeed it is, but hadn't you better
measure him first?
Mrs. Davies pushes Rhodri towards Mr. Morgan, who flips
out a tape measure and begins to measure Rhodri.
Mr. Morgan's daughter, MEG, enters the room from the back
of the store. She is a homely, but attractive, young lady
of about 35.
GARETH MORGAN
Ah, there you are Meg? Good girl. This
is my daughter Meg.
MRS. DAVIES
I was not aware that you had a
daughter, Mr. Morgan?
GARETH MORGAN
Her mother died recently and she landed on
my doorstep. She's my young apprentice. Here
Meg, show Rhodri what you can do.
Mr. Morgan gently places the measuring tape in her hands
and watches her measure Rhodri.
GARETH MORGAN
You're putting on a bit of weight boy,
this year. You're rather portly. One
might even be tempted to say stout.
Mr. Morgan walks over and sits with Mrs. Davies.
MRS. DAVIES
Oh, don't be so naughty, Mr. Morgan.
You do tease people so, you know. It
embarasses him to be called stout. And
Meg, you don't think he's stout, do you?
MEG
Oh no. I think he's just lovely.
Rhodri stands in isolation on the floor of the tailor shop,
trembling slightly.
RHODRI
(VO)
It was my birthday. That year marked
the forty-third celebration of my
presence with my mother in some sort of
tailor's shop here on this earth.
MRS. DAVIES
Meg, did you know that we used to call your
father Organ Morgan when he was a boy?
Mr. Morgan laughs at this comment
MEG
Stop it.
RHODRI
(puzzled)
Stop what?
MEG
Not you, them. They're teasing.
MRS. DAVIES
Do you remember, Mr. Morgan? We used to call
you Organ Morgan when you were a boy!
GARETH MORGAN
That's because I sang so loud in church?
Morgan and Mrs. Davies laugh at this revelation. Morgan
then turns his attention to Rhodri.
GARETH MORGAN
Open your legs wider, boy. Let her get
in to work?
Meg generates a soft velvety touch, as she moves the
brass end of her measuring tape up the inside of Rhodri's
trousers leg. He grabs it from her hand and positions it
against the nest of his crotch. She measures down between
navel and crotch.
GARETH MORGAN
Short as ever is he, Meg?
MEG
Oh dad! There's a tease you are!
Meg and Rhodri look at each other briefly. Morgan gives
Mrs. Davies a mischievious grin..
MRS. DAVIES
It's much too late for him to grow now.
GARETH MORGAN
Well, except perhaps outwards?
Morgan gives Rhodri a friendly nod and a wink. He gives
Mrs. Davies a nudge. Meg gives Rhodri a little tap on his
belly above the waistband of his pants, and a little pinch.
MEG
There's naughty you are!
GARETH MORGAN
Just the job, Meg? About eight inches
off the leg?
Morgan goes over to the rack and, like a conjuror pulling
a rabbit from a hat, produces the suit.
RHODRI
(VO)
And what a suit it was! Hand-tailored
in Italy from virgin lamb's wool.
Charcoal gray and fully lined jacket.
Satin trim, satin covered buttons, and
made to measure.
Morgan holds the suit up for Mrs. Davies's approval; he
turns it, pats it, strokes the material till it glows in
the shop. She nods in satisfaction.
MRS. DAVIES
That's what I call a nice suit, Mr.
Morgan. And he needs a nice suit, now
that he's an university professor.
GARETH MORGAN
He must try it on.
Morgan hands the suit to Meg who sets it on a hook
nearby. She presses gently against Rhodri as she attempts
to assist him in removing his jacket. Then, with intimate
care, she prepares the coat and, as Rhodri turns to place
his arms in the sleeves she holds towards him, she runs
her fingers lingeringly over his shoulders and back.
GARETH MORGAN
A perfect fit, Meg. What a lovely boy.
MEG
Oh, lovely, lovely. He's just perfect,
Mrs Davies.
Mrs. Davies gives a look of approval.
GARETH MORGAN
And now you're going to try on the
trousers, and you will need Meg to help
you.
Meg's hand moves towards Rhodri's zippered fly, but
Rhodri turns away and quickly steps towards the dressing
room at the back of the shop.
GARETH MORGAN
Oh, there's shy he is.
Meg removes trousers off the hangar and moves toward
the back of the shop.
GARETH MORGAN
Go after him, Meg. Don't stop now.
Rhodri walks back into the room with no pants on.
MRS. DAVIES
Come along. Let Meg Morgan help you
into your birthday trousers, dear.
GARETH MORGAN
Hold out the waistband for him, Meg.
He'll have to step into them.
Mr. Morgan turns to Mrs. Davies
GARETH MORGAN
And then we'll see some action.
MRS. DAVIES
Oh, Mr. Morgan, you shouldn't! You and
Meg mustn't go to so much trouble. He
can do it himself. He's a big boy now.
GARETH MORGAN
We can see that, can't we Meg? And a
lovely boy, too.
Meg is kneeling in front of Rhodri reaching behind him
adjusting the trousers. Meg is looking longingly at a spot
about halfway between his stomach and knees. Meg
sighs.
Mrs. Davies sighs. Mr. Morgan sighs. Rhodri sighs in
exasperation.
MRS. DAVIES
Oh, Mr. Morgan, you did say it would be
about eight inches.
Meg measures Rhodri's trouser cuff. The tape shows
eight inches.
GARETH MORGAN
Uh huh, naked or clothed I can always
estimate how much it'll take. I've got
a good eye for size.
Meg pushes Rhodri gently towards his mother who looks
absolutely thrilled.
MRS. DAVIES
He looks lovely. He'll take it.
GARETH MORGAN
You'll need us to do the alterations,
of course.
MRS. DAVIES
Oh no, Mr. Morgan, that wouldn't be
right. You and Meg have been much too
kind already. I might be confined to a
wheelchair, but I'm not completely
useless, you know. Leave the pins where
I can see them clearly. Of course, Meg,
you could always come over and help.
MEG
Oh, lovely, lovely, Mrs. Davies. I would
love to do that.
Rhodri looks at Meg with surprise. He starts
to back up for the door.
GARETH MORGAN
Oh, you're not rushing away, ah ah you'll
want Meg to help you.
Rhodri is trying to remove the jacket and his hands
become handcuffed behind his back by both jacket sleeves.
As Rhodri struggles to free the jacket, the pants slide
neatly around his feet, imprisoning them as well.
MEG
Oh Rhodri.
Rhodri looks back at her and smiles
MRS. DAVIES
Mr. Morgan, would you like him to try his
shirt on now?
Rhodri starts to speak, but before he gets a word out,
his mother glares at him and he falls silent.
RHODRI
But, mother...
MRS. DAVIES
You're having an outfit.
Rhodri struggles to pull up the trousers and waddles
awkwardly towards the dressing room.
Montage: Rhodri and Meg trying out shirts, ties and
handkerchiefs against the suit hanging on a hook on
the back wall.
RHODRI
(VO)
My mother and Mr. Morgan were having an
animated discussion about the merits of
button-down collars on shirts; plain
shirts and striped shirts; next came ties;
striped ties or plain ties; club ties,
regimental ties, or old school ties.
MRS. DAVIES
I'd like to finish up soon, Mr. Morgan.
I have my tea at this time.
EXT. STREET BY TAILOR SHOP - DAY
Mrs. Davies is sitting in her wheelchair as Rhodri hands
her the day's purchases. Gareth Morgan extends his hand
to Rhodri and shakes it.
GARETH MORGAN
Happy birthday, boy, come back and see
us soon. Can't wait to see you in
your birthday suit.
MRS. DAVIES
Oh Rhodri, you'll deliver brilliant
lectures in your birthday suit. Come along
now, I must have my tea. Good bye, Meg.
Good day Mr. Morgan.
GARETH MORGAN
Good bye, Mrs. Davies. Good bye,
Rhodri.
Rhodri looks longingly at Meg. Meg returns the glance and
waves goodbye to him.
MRS. DAVIES
Come along, Rhodri.
RHODRI
Yes, mother.
Rhodri navigates his mother away from the store
INT. CLASSROOM - DAY
Rhodri looks up from his pad of paper. He looks around
the classroom.
RHODRI
(VO)
As I drank my cup of tea later that
day, I marveled to myself that, once
again, I had spent an entire afternoon
shopping with my mother and had hardly
managed to speak a word.
(beat)
Six weeks later, my mother was dead. I
went home for her funeral, and I wore
the last suit she would ever buy me.
INT. FUNERAL PARLOUR - DAY
In the hallway a sign says Gwendolyn Davies
Rhodri is standing beside his mother's unopened coffin.
His attitude is almost of denial. An ATTENDANT enters the
room and approaches him.
ATTENDANT
Shall I open the coffin now?
RHODRI
(determined voice)
No. That won't be necessary.
ATTENDANT
Oh, but I have dressed her in what we like
to call her birthday suit ready for her
rebirth into the splendors of heaven.
Here, we'll just take a little....
As the Attendant starts to raise the coffin lid, Rhodri
intervenes and places his hand forcefully on the coffin.
ATTENDANT
Alright.
The attendant leaves the room and Rhodri stands looking
down at the coffin.
RHODRI
(VO)
I imagined her as I seemed to remember
her: so talkative, so volatile, so
spirited, so unquenchable. This thing
of silence was not the woman who
chattered all the way home from Mr.
Gareth Morgan's shop as she clutched
the bright blue and green bags in which she
bore the suit I now wore.
EXT. GRAVEYARD - DAY
At the graveyard, Rhodri and several mourners including
Mr. Gareth Morgan and Meg are consoling each other.
Mr Morgan shakes Rhodri's hand and moves away silently.
Meg approaches Rhodri. There is a moment where neither
knows what to do. There is an embrace which is
genuine and warm.
MEG
I'm so sorry Rhodri
She walks away as Rhodri looks after her.
INT. CLASSROOM - DAY
Rhodri looks up from his pad of paper. The students are
still writing in their exam tablets.
RHODRI
(VO)
Today it is my birthday, and I am
sitting in class, wearing the birthday
suit my mother bought me last year. I
have had time to reflect on my
relationship with my mother, and now I
know what I must do.
He turns his attention to the blonde girl in the front
row. At that moment she looks up, her eyes lock with his.
She stares right at him.
EXT. TAILOR SHOP - DAY
Rhodri walks briskly up the street toward the tailor
shop. As he arrives at the shop entrance, Meg emerges
from inside and sees him approaching.
RHODRI
Good day, Miss. Morgan.
MEG
Good day to you, Mr. Davies
RHODRI
Please, you must call me Rhodri.
MEG
Okay Rhodri, you can call me Meg.
RHODRI
Very well Meg, I am in need of a fine
suit as befits an ... university
professor.
MEG
Oh I'm afraid my father is away today.
RHODRI
I didn't come here for a fitting by your
father, Meg. I was hoping that you
would look after my birthday suit this
year. Can you do that for me, Meg?
MEG
Oh yes, Rhodri. Please come in. I know
just what to do.
As Rhodri enters the store, Meg takes his arm. The door
closes behind them.